Skip to content

Kevin Butler

Click the button below to make a donation in memory of Kevin Butler


Published in May 2024

July 13, 1953 – May 17, 2024

Kevin died in Exeter, NH, surrounded by his family, from complications related to his struggle with ALS.

Kevin was born in Washington, D.C. to Ann S. Butler of Cambridge, MA and Michael V. Butler of St. Paul, MN. He and his two younger sisters were raised in Cambridge and Watertown, MA and in Birmingham and Beverly Hills, MI. After returning to Massachusetts and graduating from Harvard College, Kevin and his first spouse Susan raised two children, Eric and Scott, in Dorchester and Acton, MA. Later, Kevin married James McPhee who was his partner for more than 18 years, and they have lived in Brentwood, NH since 2021.

Kevin worked briefly in non-profit marketing, then spent his career in high tech marketing, writing and designing for several ad agencies and tech companies in Massachusetts.

For many years, Kevin was very active and had leadership roles in various church congregations in Massachusetts. Later, from 2005 onward, he was deeply involved in the Gay Fathers of Greater Boston organization, including serving as president for several years. He enjoyed non-profit leadership and market consulting in his retirement.

Kevin was a proud self-avowed nerd who was much acclaimed for his knowledge and expertise in a wide variety of topics and pursuits. He was self-taught in an impressive variety of subjects, including home renovation, the guitar and piano (both of which he played very well), and as an amateur magician and stand-up comic. Kevin especially loved music, theater, and performance: he sang for years in church choirs, and loved acting in community theater musicals as well as entertaining family and friends.

From an early age, Kevin was deeply fond of the Adirondack region where his extended family has a vacation property. Kevin and Jim also had a deep love of the American West, and visited many national parks together, and enjoyed extensive travel and trips over the years.

Kevin cherished, was blessed by, and was very proud of his sons and step-son, their spouses, and was delighted in his two grandsons.

Kevin is survived by his husband, James McPhee of Brentwood, NH; son Eric Butler and wife Sharon of Raleigh, NC; son Scott Butler and husband Simeon Maleh of Brooklyn, NY; stepson Jacob Lee-McPhee and wife Amanda; grandsons Wesley and Oliver Lee-McPhee of Exeter, NH; sister Faith Binder and wife Barbara Wilson of Chittenango, NY; sister Martha Butler and husband Joseph Russo of Bristol, RI; nephew Michael Binder and niece Grace Binder; and several cousins. Kevin was predeceased by his parents, Michael and Ann.

During this past year, Kevin has been very grateful for the generous attention and sacrificial help from Scott, Jacob, Michael, and Eric as well as several wonderful neighbors and dear old friends. The Visiting Angels who worked with Kevin soon became like family and were important in their roles. He appreciated the support of the Healey Center at MGH and his CORE physicians. The family also is grateful for the outstanding care that Kevin received at Exeter Hospital’s ER and ICU in the week before his passing.

In lieu of flowers, the family would suggest contributions be made to this important organization:

Compassionate Care ALS (CCALS), P.O. Box 1052, West Falmouth, MA 02574


Friends and family are invited to drop in to socialize and remember Kevin on Saturday, July 27, 2024 between 1-3pm at the Daniel B. Stockbridge Funeral Home, 141 Epping Road, Exeter, NH. At 3pm, there will be special time of remembrance and celebration of Kevin’s life.

People attending might wear something purple, Kevin’s favorite color.